Admitting and Learning from Your Mistakes: You Actually Aren’t Smarter, More Competent, or More Moral Than the Average Person.

Admitting and Learning from Your Mistakes: You Actually Aren’t Smarter, More Competent, or More Moral Than the Average Person.

You are just like everyone else. You are probably not smarter than the average person. You are probably no more competent than the average person. You are likely not more moral than the average person. You need to understand these things before you will be ready to admit you are wrong and before you can grow.

Most of us have an innate belief we are better than the average person. There is a pretty obvious reason this isn’t true. The word “average” actually refers to you. It refers to me. It refers to all the people you went to school with, work with, and every member of your family. It refers to almost everyone we know. The simple, hard truth, is you are likely very similar in intelligence, competence, and morals as the average person. You probably are, in fact, average.

It is natural to believe these things about ourselves. In fact, it's the way the average person, just like you, thinks. It is a part of your brain’s way of influencing your abilities in self-preservation. Your brain has a way of tricking you into believing you are correct. Most of the memories you have are actually not even correct because your brain, on a subconscious level, has altered your memories, pulling information from several places inside your brain, to fit the story you need to hear. You think you remember exact details, but really, your subconscious is just beating you to the punch line and showing you what your conscious self wants or needs to believe in order to fit your story.

This is why it's so hard to admit you’re wrong. You don’t actually believe you are. Somebody else wronged you. It was their actions or words that justified your actions. You had to do what you did because it was the smarter, more moral course. To be wrong, creates cognitive dissonance inside you, an internal war in your mind that makes you question your own morals, your intelligence, your capabilities. Admitting you are wrong is difficult and goes against what your conscious and subconscious mind wants for itself. Admitting you’re wrong feels like you are dumber than average, less competent, or possess lesser morals.

Below is a link for a podcast from The Art of Manliness which is worth listening to as the guest, a senior psychologist, explains more on cognitive dissonance and the difficulty we have admitting we are wrong. He provides some interesting insights into how our feelings about things actually change based on our actions as we go through life. He addresses the war we have and offers some really good advice on how you can recognize you are wrong and then grow through that admission and experience. He discusses how you can stay in that state of cognitive dissonance and use it. 

Admitting you’re wrong is one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. It will force you to grow. It is extremely uncomfortable. It is worth it. It will probably make you smarter, more competent, and more moral than the average person. 

Why Is It So Hard to Admit You Were Wrong? - The Art of Manliness | Podcast on Spotify